Life | Why your 30’s won’t be what you thought they’d be.

You thought you’d have it all figured out by the time you’re 30 but you don’t?

Join the club.

Assuming there’s a dream job ( or a dream anything for that matter ) is setting us up for failure.

Maybe things didn’t go as planned and your current carreer is not as fast paced as you hoped it would be, but it’s ok, as long as you have a vision of where you want to get and keep trying.  Even if you still have to take nightmare jobs to make rent, this experience will teach you valuable lessons that you can then turn to you advantage.

You thought you’d have it all figured out by the time you are 30 but guess what. Life does not care about those mental deadlines.  Social norms have been radically modified and people do things their own way instead of following certain protocols. Figuring out who you are and what you’re doing instead of blindly copying specific behavious, is a longer journey, worth taking.

We’ve been told that the ideal body is a necessary prerequisite for health and happiness.  At some point you just realise that the best version of yourself is the ultimate goal and learn to work with what you got.

 

 

Learning how to feel relaxed and self-confident in social situations is a process. If you are the kind of person who gets uncomfortable in certain social situations your mind will probably always start racing when you feel exposed and you will still have to deal with the occassional awkward silence every once in a while. And that is totally ok.

‘Nuff said.

 

 

What kind of expectations did you have for your 30’s and how did that turn out? Feel free to add to the list and hopefully we’ll all learn from each other.

speak soon,

Chelf

 

62 Comments

  • Meryland Cuevas May 1, 2017 at 2:00 pm

    I remember when I was approaching my 30th birthday, I was feeling overwhelmed and frustrated because I thought that I was starting to get old, that I have so many things accomplished, that I was going to start racing against the clock.. blah blah blah! I couldn’t even enjoy the fact that I was entering a new decade in my life! Now I will be 43 and I have grown so much in the past 13 years of my life! I enjoy every day as it comes and I never stop dreaming! I have let go of the expectations that only bring frustrations! Great post

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 1, 2017 at 2:05 pm

      Thank you so much for stopping by

      Reply
    • Meryland Cuevas May 1, 2017 at 2:09 pm

      I made a typo – I meant to say “so many things unaccomplished” – When I reached 30 I thought I needed to have a set of things already done! expectations that I didn’t reach and that is hurtful. It is important to be more realistic and more flexible, we need to give ourselves a break sometimes 🙂

      Reply
  • Amrita May 1, 2017 at 2:31 pm

    Strangely enough I have new expectations everyday .Don’t think I had different expectations when I turned thirty but always wanted to travel more ,have a child and get fitter.Doing all that !

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 1, 2017 at 2:55 pm

      you are acing it

      Reply
  • Riley May 1, 2017 at 3:13 pm

    I’m still in my twenties but I think it’s pretty easy to have expectations for yourself when you hit the 30’s mark. Be married, have a killer job, maybe have a kid or two, and have everything in the world. I think we live in a world now where it’s okay to not have it all. 30 is the new 20. Great post 🙂

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 1, 2017 at 3:33 pm

      thank you so much

      Reply
  • heidi May 1, 2017 at 3:48 pm

    Well all true! I am older and wasted much time figuring it out and the answer is you never really do. The great lesson is to enjoy the journey and stop trying to figure it all out. I hope we will break down the unrealistic ideal of what women should look like. Healthy doesn’t mean skinny. Great post

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 1, 2017 at 4:31 pm

      exactly! Thank you for stopping by!

      Reply
  • Danasia May 2, 2017 at 3:29 pm

    I just turned 30 in December and so far I’ve enjoyed it very much! I’m looking forward to experiencing my 30s.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 2, 2017 at 10:54 pm

      I bet it will be amazing!

      Reply
  • Nellwyn May 2, 2017 at 6:57 pm

    I’m turning 27 in a couple months and, even though it’s not quite 30, I definitely thought I would have more figured out by now. I really thought I would have achieved that grown up mindset by this age, but I still feel as uncertain about life as I did when I was twenty-two!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 2, 2017 at 10:47 pm

      you and me darling <3

      Reply
  • Meredith May 2, 2017 at 8:10 pm

    Now that I’m midway through my 30’s, I can still say that I don’t feel like an “grown-up” most days. My life is a totally different place than it was when I turned 30, but it’s wonderful!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 2, 2017 at 10:47 pm

      I feel ya

      Reply
  • Saidy Villalobos May 3, 2017 at 1:44 am

    I’m in my 20’s and i honestly can’t wait to be in my 30’s (:
    Keep it up!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 11:11 am

      I bet they will be awesome! Thanks for stopping by!

      Reply
  • Courtney Andrews May 3, 2017 at 1:56 am

    I’ll be 30 in July and still feel like I have so much to figure out. Just today I called my mom to ask for some advice 🙂

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 11:09 am

      I feel the same way!

      Reply
  • Akamatra May 3, 2017 at 12:39 pm

    Well apart from the perfect body which is always an unreachable goal for me, my expectations for my 30s where pretty much met with reality. Then again they weren’t too hard to reach! Lucky me!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 3:03 pm

      congrats! lucky you!

      Reply
  • Amber Myers May 3, 2017 at 12:59 pm

    Yup, I still don’t have things figured out and I’m in my 30s. Sometimes I have no idea what the heck I’m doing.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 3:03 pm

      same here

      Reply
  • Celine | The Beautyboulevard May 3, 2017 at 1:24 pm

    Well, many years to come until I turn 30 haha.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 3:02 pm

      enjoy your age no matter what!

      Reply
  • roxy May 3, 2017 at 1:31 pm

    This basically sounds like my 20’s. Nothing has really gone how I thought it would. I’m not even going to start trying to plan my 30’s…other than having babies and hopefully losing the baby weight

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 2:29 pm

      good call

      Reply
  • ellie May 3, 2017 at 1:40 pm

    I was not happy about the thought of turning 30 when I was 29, leaving my 20’s and feeling like 40 was so close now but my 30’s are the same really, I had the things that I thought you get when you’re in your 30’s (home/ career/ Partner/ pets etc…) when I was mid 20’s so it’s just a continuation of mortgage, bills etc… lol! My life definitely turned out different than I expeccted, in the best way. 30’s pretty good 🙂

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 2:28 pm

      yay for 30’s

      Reply
  • Adarsh M May 3, 2017 at 2:06 pm

    This is true. I didn’t read such an interesting post before. Thank you for sharing this post.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 2:27 pm

      thank you for stopping by

      Reply
  • Sheri May 3, 2017 at 2:37 pm

    30 was a great turning point for me. A great year of change, enlightenment, learning and removing negativity from my life!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 5:00 pm

      I’m so happy to hear that

      Reply
  • Ravi May 3, 2017 at 4:14 pm

    Your post made me look back and think about mid twenties and current mid thirties. I could clearly see a lot of difference in all aspects of life..Time fleets!..

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 3, 2017 at 4:59 pm

      Time flies indeed!

      Reply
  • Ana May 3, 2017 at 6:30 pm

    I will be turning next year but I’m sure it will be a new phase of my life. I don’t have any expectations as such but I know that it will be my new 20’s!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:50 pm

      I love your point of view Ana!

      Reply
  • the Fashion Sherlock May 3, 2017 at 7:46 pm

    ahhhhh!!! this was all so very true. I thought I was on a good path after 30, but I still don’t know what i’m doing. I really believe to just go with the flow.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:42 pm

      agreed

      Reply
  • carol May 3, 2017 at 7:50 pm

    Fantastic post! Having passed 30 a LONG time ago I can tell you that you’ve hit it spot on. The number doesn’t change how we feel inside but it does give us a bit of perspective to deal with whatever comes our way!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:42 pm

      exactly! best of both worlds!

      Reply
  • Addison May 3, 2017 at 8:15 pm

    I just turned 30 this year and I love it. I am finally comfortable going for things.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:43 pm

      good for you! Team Addison!

      Reply
  • Deimarys May 3, 2017 at 10:22 pm

    I had a lot of expectations… They all crashed and burned. So, here I am… mid 30’s… New expectations!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:43 pm

      same here Deimarys

      Reply
  • Tasheena @ SimplyTasheena.com May 4, 2017 at 1:41 am

    I had a lot of expectations in my 20’s to the point that I probably was doing too much “adulting”. Just trying to enjoy my 30’s.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:44 pm

      Time to make up for it Tasheena!

      Reply
  • David Elliott May 4, 2017 at 5:06 am

    I definitely had all kinds of ideas about what life was going to be like when I was thirty. I guess the older I get the more I am constantly surprised by life. It’s not as I had expected it to be. But somehow I feel like it’s the life that I needed. It’s the only life that would have forced me to grow.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:45 pm

      I can totally relate David

      Reply
  • Christie Brown May 4, 2017 at 5:36 am

    I’m lucky enough to have a good few years until I turn 30, but I’m already kind of dreading it aha. I love that you can look at these “expectations” in such a positive light. 🙂

    Christie’s Take on Life. xx

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:46 pm

      it’s just a number darling 🙂

      Reply
  • Lennae Stubbs May 4, 2017 at 8:05 am

    Nawww this is great timing! I recently turned 30 a couple of months back! I was having what felt like mid life crisis in the last weeks leading up. After turning 30, I was kinda like what was that all about? I’m 30, I’ve got a great year ahead & the great thing is, I do have a great year ahead. Thanks for sharing!

    Lennae xxx
    http://www.lennaesworld.com

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:47 pm

      Thanks for stopping by Lennae! I bet you do have a great year ahead and I can’t wait to hear how it goes! Hugs!

      Reply
  • Fatima Torres May 4, 2017 at 1:52 pm

    Thank you for your honesty! I’ll be 30 in two years and it’s been such an eye-opener to realize where I am today as opposed to where I thought I would be.

    Timing is everything, but you never want to force anything or make yourself feel as though you have a time limit on anything. Things happen at their own pace.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:48 pm

      Exactly! Theres no point in forcing things!

      Reply
  • Anosa May 4, 2017 at 2:06 pm

    I definitely feel you. Indeed there are a lot of things going on our minds. That expectations versus reality is really mind opening. Some says its a mid-life crisis. But once you get over it, you’ll forget and just smile about it.

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 4, 2017 at 2:49 pm

      Exactly! Smiling and moving on! Thanks for stopping by Anosa!

      Reply
  • Cassie @ Be Forever Healthier May 8, 2017 at 3:04 am

    I’ll be 30 in a year and a half as my mother reminded me yesterday! At least there’s some things to look forward to hey – particularly that last one haha

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 8, 2017 at 10:29 am

      well said lol

      Reply
  • Cole Nemeth May 8, 2017 at 4:33 pm

    I’m officially in my late 20s now, and my husband turns 30 next month. I used to really freak out about getting older and not accomplishing everything I thought I should have, but now I’m really just enjoying the journey! Nothing ever turns out how I expect lol, but sometimes it’s better!

    Reply
    • the_chelf@yahoo.gr May 8, 2017 at 4:57 pm

      exactly! Sometimes things turn out so much better!

      Reply
  • John K May 27, 2017 at 5:34 pm

    It’s not as we were dreaming kids but you are in a good way if it’s much better than you could imagine when you were 25 years old…Think positive,try not hard but with method,try a lot of things and remember…Get as close as you can to the impossible…

    Reply

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